So You Want to Date a Triathlete: Dating Guide for Dummies

So you wanna date a triathlete…

I’ve written guides for racing, guides for surviving MBA courses, guides for eating, and guides for being incredibly awesome in general. I have not, however, put out a guide exploring the daring and romantic side of multisport athletes. I’m not an expert; I’m not even a professional. I’m simply an observer and disseminator of information. Be afraid, be very afraid!

I have my hands in many pies… I know everything about all of my friends, I organize, I build social bridges, I consume information, I store information, I file information, and I leverage information. This is just another example of how I put all of that stuff to good use.

I wrote this a few months ago but just finished it up. Hope you enjoy!

  • Bring food offerings early and bring them often. They won’t go to waste.
  • Don’t question our sanity when we get upset about running 10 seconds slower per mile. That’s normal.
  • Don’t be frustrated if our race bike gets cleaned more than our apartment.
  • Timeliness to meals will always be rewarded; lateness will be frowned upon.
  • Try not to guilt trip me when I’m ready for bed at 10 PM on a Friday.
  • Yes, buying matching race gear could be the highlight of my week.
  • There’s road trips and then there’s road trips to a race. Yes, they’re separate…
  • Swimming, biking, and running are, in fact, the second greatest things going on in our life at the moment. You are truly icing on the cake!
  • Power naps are highly encouraged. Let them happen!
  • Be prepared to provide plenty of forgiveness for the amount of training gear strewn between the front door and the kitchen (the most important room in any house).
  • Always make it very clear when we need to set apart extra special time for you (assuming that we still consistently surprise you). Otherwise, you’ll be competing with the bike again for a Friday evening…
  • Daily trips to the grocery store have the potential to be very exciting if properly embraced.
  • Training is only 49% of the fun. You’re the other 51%!
  • Compliments from female triathletes like “sexy wheelset,” “sweet aero gear,” and “nice calves” are not meant to incite jealously with you.
  • “I’m sleeping in this weekend” actually means “I’m getting up for an hour swim and a four hour bike ride on Saturday. Sunday I’m going for a 10 mile run followed by yoga. Have breakfast without me but try and save me leftovers!”
  • You’re a priority, we promise. But so are our outdoor adventures…
  • “I’ve got a few things to do after work” usually means a bike-run workout followed by an hour and a half massage, cooking, stretching, a nice bath, and falling into bed.
  • Don’t ever call our lifestyle choices dumb.
  • The indoor trainer is a good way to spend together time. I’ll bike, and you relax on the couch and cuddle with pillows.
  • “I’ll be over in a bit” probably references a 30 mile lap around town and then showing up at your door in sweaty cycling gear.
  • Ask questions that show you’re curious as to why the pointy helmet costs $200. It’s sexy to show interest!
  • Understand that time is a valuable commodity. Don’t take any time together for granted because we could’ve been exercising but we chose to be with you.
  • Even when you have our undivided attention there will still be remnants floating around in our gray goo about multi-sport activities…or eating. Lots of eating!
  • If it’s OK for you to buy a $400 purse, it’s OK for us to buy new running shoes.
  • Behind food and racing gear, you will be the most important thing we spend money on :-$
  • Be sure to appreciate date nights. That was time that could’ve been spent training (and had wisely been skipped).
  • Don’t worry if we burst into tears, we’re probably imagining our awful time utilizing the foam roller…
  • Shaved legs are actually a rite of passage. We want you to appreciate how awesome our already large legs are without any hair on them. At least pretend to be impressed!
  • If a race falls on your birthday, be prepared for a barrage of flowers and assorted gift items the week before. The race will still happen even though you take the cake on that day :D
  • Always remember that race season is the 5th and most important season of the year. We live for those days!

In addition, there are two rules that ALWAYS apply under any circumstances… show mercy!

  1. I am always hungry
  2. I am always tired

Take the list with a grain of salt and a good sense off humor … Of course you will be the #1 priority in a triathlete’s life just let them have their sports too!

Hope this gave you a few good laughs along with a legitimate idea or two about the experience. Have a wonderful weekend!

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