Souperrrr Bowl And Why I Don’t Care

Happy Taco Tuesday from the Biggest Little City!

February is ticking away, and as a month already shorter than normal, it’s going to be an intense one. Triathlon training is gearing up, despite my XTERRA wetsuit being backordered an additional two months, which is highly annoying considering it was ordered in December. Ah well, such is life…

It’s no secret that I can’t stand the NFL, especially compared to college football, and Sunday’s “game of the year” just goes to show you how right I am. The Broncos forgot to show up and play, and I was able to save myself 4.5 hours from blobbing on the couch wasting my life watching a leatherback butchery in the making. Thank you for that, Seahawks! Instead, I was able to dig into my easy chair with a great book and big bowl of soup and enjoy my evening away from the hooting and hollering (and sobs from Denver fans). Even the worst World Series in recent memory was more entertaining than the slaughter that was Sunday’s affair, from what I hear.

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A number of things really tick me off about the Super Bowl, so here we go…

  1. Pure ridiculousness – I find the amount of emotional investment, measurable impact to one’s life, and sheer chaos around the game absolutely preposterous! I heard of Bronco fans crying, threatening people, skipping work because they felt sick, etc. etc. Seriously people!? I wasn’t that distraught even when I tanked it halfway through the run during a half Ironman and blew my PR by a solid 20 minutes. The bloody football game doesn’t even matter! When it boils down to two teams smashing helmets on the gridiron, what are the chances that the outcome of that game will ruin your life, assuming you didn’t bet the mortgage, car, and first three children on the game…oh wait, that’s right, IT DOESN’T!
  2. It’s not reality – As much as you people like to identify with your team like it’s your family, they aren’t. You have absolutely no impact whatsoever on how well a player does, whether or not the field goal goes wide, or even what the outcome of a coin toss may be. In fact, I would argue that these players are so far removed from reality that it truly just does not matter. At all! Where has the leisurely enjoyment of a sport gone? It’s turned into a mass media frenzy full of (a few) humorous commercials, a bunch of raunchy and unentertaining halftime shows, and fair football (except the year the Giants beat the Patriots because I was the only one in the room pulling for them).
  3. Obnoxious fans – This statement isn’t for everyone, however, there are plenty of you out there who are dumb, obnoxious, obsessed, and either overly annoyed or overly happy the day after the Super Bowl. You know who you are too! I can understand being passionate about something. What I don’t understand is letting it just dominate your entire existence. Have some backbone and astute character people! IT’s FREAKING FOOTBALL! And seriously, if I hear one more comment from a freaking Seahawks fan about the “12th man” I will probably stab myself in the knee cap. Twice. Just because you are a fan of the winning team does not make you instantaneously cool. Get over yourself.

It just confuses me how people can get so wrapped up in a multimedia clusterf@#k that lasts for half of a day and yet our economy struggles, our education system is crap, and people remain less than remarkable. How come no one wants to dig into the details on the important stuff? Hobbies, sports, and external activities are there for a reason and a very healthy reason: burn off stress, create interests, and to help you see the world differently. That doesn’t, however, entitle them to rule our lives when we are spectators through our tubes. I totally get it if a college or NFL level athlete is super engrossed in the Super Bowl. They know what it takes to get there, to hang with the big boys, and to make the team day after day…

I love sports. I love championship games. Pfff, I even build my life around triathlon. What I do not do is let the outcome of an event I have no control over ruin my outlook on life, or for that matter make it feel like everything is just wonderful. That’s far too narrow, superficial, and boring.

The positive side, and yes I had to try very hard to put this down in the middle of my rant, is that the social aspects (and only the social aspects) of the Super Bowl are quite fun. Chilling with your friends, enjoying a relatively stress-free afternoon by not getting involved in the emotional turmoil of team-choosing, and enjoying each other for who you are is a pretty good way to go through life. It’s an experience that’s hard to beat, except when the World Series is on because we all know baseball is superior in every way to professional football.

For those of you still crying and gnashing your teeth, first, stop and second, get a freaking grip. I have the utmost confidence that you can repair all that emotional damage by the time September rolls around for the next season. I had the pleasure of being from Peyton Manning’s hometown and got to watch him play college ball on into his career with the Colts. There were also two players from the University of Nevada on the Broncos and I am far less than distraught at the outcome. I thought it was great they made it to the big show! Congrats for them. And that is where I shall leave that.

Picture credit 1. Picture credit 2.

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